Child Development and Possible Reactions to Death (Divorce)

“If we can see the initial problem or trigger for the Alienator, i.e. loss and inability to complete the grieving process, or just not having control anymore, then maybe we can better protect the children and targeted spouse with proper correction/direction for the alienating spouse. In other words, we find a proper method of helping the Alienator to move forward in their lives by recognizing their part and inability to let go and move on. This in turn trickles down to their treatment of the children and the targeted parent, which in turn, then stops Parental Alienation.”

Parental Alienation

Age Range (3-5 years old)

Concepts of Death(Divorce)

  • It is temporary and reversible
  • Death/divorce is mixed up with sleep and trips
  • May wonder what the deceased/missing are doing
  • They will never die
  • Sees death(divorce) as special, but not why
  • Death (Divorce) occurs when something bad is done


  • Cranky (feelings are acted out in play)
  • Confused about changes
  • Angry and scared
  • Withdrawn


  • May be interested in dead (divorced) things
  • Cry
  • Fight
  • Act as if death (divorce) never occurred

Age Range (6-9 years old)

Concepts of Death (Divorce)

  • Views death (divorce) as real, though real is distant
  • Begins to understand that death (divorce) is irreversible
  • Realizes everyone, including self, will die (Divorce/have family problems) someday
  • A spirit gets you when you die (divorce) because you are too slow to get away
  • Who will care for them if a parent dies (divorces)?
  • Asks questions about the biological processes of death (divorce)

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